Feels Like Home to Me (Music Monday)

Everytime I hear this song by Chantal Kreviazuk I am overwhelmed with emotions. First introduced to it in "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days," I will always remember the first time I heard it with M, as we folded laundry in a dark room, watching the movie and singing along. I was amazed he even knew the song and he winked, smiled his sweet smile at me and told me there was plenty of things I didn't know about him yet. Then he held out his hand, lifted me up and we danced around the room sharing a romantic embrace and lots of kisses. It makes me feel so secure and complete and just reminds me, time and time again, how home is where he is and where we are together.

Strawberry Fields

Ok maybe not strawberry fields, but a few days ago I posted about how something was eating my strawberry plants and how I had to hang a beautiful Topsy Turvy Strawberry Planter to keep the rodents away.

And here is our first harvest! It hasn't even been three weeks and here we are. I am so pleased and they taste oh-so-delicious!

Aren't they beautiful? Maybe I don't have a black thumb after all!

Three Years

M and I are celebrating three years together today. I can't believe it's been three years. Some moments it feels like there was never a life before him and others it feels like just yesterday we embarked on this journey together without ever looking back.

Three years ago I was stuck in limbo and needing to get out. I'd been stuck for too long. After a few nights spent out with friends at local dive bars in early 2007, by May 1st there was no denying it, I had a giddy, school girl crush on M. I remember the day I admitted it and feeling a rush of emotions. My dear friend Brenda nodded saying she already knew and how did it feel to finally be happy? So naturally when M planned a get together with our friends for another night out on the town hitting up our favorite bars, I jumped at the opportunity. We made plans to go out on May 3, 2007 around 8P. So when he called at 6P and told me that everyone had cancelled and it was only going to be him and I, my anxiety rose, my breath grew shallow and I knew where it was headed. It was going to be him and I; and even though he didn't call it a date, it was. He threw me a sly, "Well I haven't been to the movies in awhile, why don't we go see a movie?" and thus our journey together started.

He picked me up around 8 and I remember jumping in his truck and taking a deep breath in of his cologne and swooning; I knew I was in trouble. We went out for some drinks at Dave & Buster's, talked about where we were in our lives and headed off to a movie. After that we headed to one of our favorite bars to talk and cap off the bar. And as a true gentleman would, he didn't even try and kiss me goodnight. He just gave me a hug and told me he'd talk to me later.

And indeed he did. First thing the next morning he texted me to make sure I was feeling ok from the night before and to just tell me that he hoped I had a good day. I was melting...fast. And soon after he called to ask if I was interested in going out with a good friend of his that night. I must have made an impression on him as this was a clear setup for the best friend test.

We spent the night at another relaxing night at the bar (If you haven't noticed, we clearly enjoy alcohol) and ended the night with hugs and a whispered, "I work in the morning tomorrow but I'll call you when I get done. Let's go see a movie."

And that he did. He called and I answered. He wanted to see Spider-Man 3 which had just been released and I refused without seeing #1 and #2 first. So we went for a drive, picked up some food, settled in for a cozy evening at his house watching Spider-Man 1 & 2 and even throwing in Cars as well. It was the perfect evening. And as he started to fall asleep, I gently shook him awake and had him drive me home. Still with no kiss but what looked like a promising future.

He called again the next day and we set out for a dinner out at a small hole in the wall called Violet's and a night at the theaters watching Spider-Man 3. It was perfect. And by the time the night ended, we had introduced our dogs, were hand-in-hand, and sharing our first kiss, to which I replied "Finally!" when he laid his lips on mine. I could hardly wait.

We came from broken pasts; relationships that shaped us but hurt us even more so each day we reminded each other that we'd just take one day at a time and see what happened. I told him I didn't want to be 'just another girl' and he reassured me he didn't want me to be either. I told him I wanted to move back home to California to be close to my family and didn't know where I was headed in the future and he said he wanted to stay in Hawaii forever. But we continued. Faith and trust in one another and taking one baby step at a time.

And within weeks we were completely smitten. I was fully in love and so was he and we weren't so afraid of what was coming up in the future. And within two months, we were engaged and six months later, married.

Our life is amazing and I wouldn't change it in any way. We've had a lot of ups and a few downs but overall we love, trust and completely respect one another which brings an amazing level of security in our relationship. He work together as partners and make this life work for us because we know that life is better with each other in it. He's my best friend, my lover, my husband, my daughter's father, my everything. He is amazing and every day never ceases to amaze me how lucky I am. I truly have been blessed.

Happy 3 years darling!

The Welcome Wagon

So this weekend we emptied our storage unit and got everything into our house...Ok, scratch that. CORRECTION: My darling husband and my ever-so-helpful baby brother emptied our storage unit and moved everything into our house. YAY! :) And boy did I forgot how much crap we had! But everything fits perfectly with lots of room to spare and we were even able to turn little Miss B's room into a nursery playroom/guest bedroom and turned our room into a master bedroom/office/craft room with lots and lots of room to spare. I was ever so pleased and am now on the prowl for a small entertainment center for all our entertainments and a kitchen island along with a microwave and just need to empty all the wonderful boxes and find a place for everything. Which is probably my favorite part as I feel like it's Christmas morning as I rip into the boxes and find all the hidden treasures that make up our home.

But what gets me the most about our move-in weekend is our neighborhood camaraderie. I was a bit worried when I noticed one of our next door neighbors was younger, sped down our short cul-de-sac and gave off a funny vibe. Giving him the benefit of the doubt though, we've almost always had horrible neighbors so maybe I was being overly cautious. So imagine my surprise when our neighbor on the other side of us came out, introduced himself and offered M his dolly to use to move our refrigerator in. We were so touched by his sweet and helpful nature. Then the next day, as we walked around our community's garage sale, his wife came out and introduced herself as well. And when I asked her about the old Singer sewing machine she had out on the curb, she proceeded to tell me that it was her 95-year-old mother's and that she didn't sew and gave it to me for FREE!! I just about died right there in her driveway. It looks exactly like this one posted on this blog with a folding table and all. I'll be sure to post pictures later. Then later that day, our friends who live around the corner stopped by on their afternoon walk to welcome us into our new home and take a tour and later in the afternoon our neighbor from down the cul-de-sac came by with her two young kids (one that's little Miss B's age) and introduced herself as well. Then today, she came by again to see how we were settling in and told me about some fun nearby parks and invited me for playdates. And another neighbor stopped by to say hello with her young boy. As two people who are extroverted at first and value close friendships, it was so crazy to how great and friendly the neighborhood is. Another great thing is how everyone always has their garage doors open and are always outside which lets me know that we live in a great neighborhood. I'm so excited to finally settle in and be there full-time. I love neighborhoods with great camaraderie and spirit!

How it Feels to Fly

I'm such a chump. When I got pregnant two years ago (Wow, I can't believe it's been that long!) I swore my baby would sleep in her bassinet/crib and she would not be sleeping in our big King size bed with us. Well she had other things in mind and when she was born, we immediately picked up many attachment parenting techniques and she almost immediately found herself asleep in our bed or on our chests almost every night. Things continued that was for about 6-7 months until she started crawling and I was soon finding her everywhere she was NOT supposed to be. But because I liked having her so close, we kept her in our room, right next to our bed in a pack-n-play and every morning when she starts to toss and turn in midst of waking up, I pick her up and we snuggle in bed together for about an hour. It's pure bliss and it totally makes my day. Well, except for when she picks my nose, pokes my eyes and karate kicks me in bed, but you get the point.

Well here we are, she's 16 months old and she's still in our room. And as we transition into our new house, her room was the first set up and we are getting ready to keep her in there. And I feel so sad about it!!!! I know she'll do fine as we've started getting her adjusted to it by giving her naps in the crib while unpacking and she loves playing in there and putting all her toys in the closet. But what about ME? Mommy's not ready for her to move to her own room! I want her right there next to me in bed still. To wake up and make sure she's ok. To be right there when she needs me. To calm her back to sleep if she needs (even though she never does anymore) and a million other things.

I think this is one of the saddest things that I know is coming. And even though I know this blog sounds so overbearing and I'd love for her to stay small forever, I'm really not sad about her growing up. I'm just sad about her moving out of our room; Not seeing her sweet face smiling and waving to me in the morning. Or hearing her sweet voice babble in her crib.

So we'll see how this goes and how long she lasts in her room.

I'm sure little miss B will be fine. It's mommy I'm worried about.