Excluded

I am so discouraged and hurt but am trying to keep my heart light, positive and unfazed in the matter. My great grandma turns 95 in five days. 95! This is a huge blessing to us as her health has taken us all on a roller coaster over the past few months and we have been sadly, saying our goodbyes and preparing for her to go home to her Lord.

What hurts and discourages me though is that today the family had a birthday celebration for her and our section of the family (my mother, my brothers and my small family) were not extended the invitation. The sad part of it is, that we probably were extended the invitation but were never told since my parent's pending divorce has left my father void of any sort of feelings or sentiments towards anyone but himself. Seriously, who is so selfish and self-centered that they can't extend the invitation to their family so that we too could celebrate in what could be her last birthday. Oh wait, that's my father because he swears that the only reason someone could ever want to leave him is because they are having an affair. Please, get over yourself but that's for another blog another time. And the bad thing about it, is that this isn't even the first time we've been excluded. Since he talks to no one in our family (though he lives with two of us), we are often left in the dark regarding anything about family. In fact, many times we only find out about family gatherings because someone will 1) email us after the fact and say that they missed us, 2) text us and ask us what we're bringing tomorrow when we infact have no idea what the hell that person is talking about or 3) we find out because of facebook/twitter statuses. He has even gone as far as to tell my Grandma not to tell me anything because I don't need to know. Who seriously is so immature that they have to say something like that?

So unfortunately, we've been out of the loop for awhile with that side of the family and seeing as how none of us has had any sort of relationship with my father for the better part of the last five years if not longer, it leaves us with a huge feeling of emptiness in the father/child relationship as well as a the larger family relationship. And instead we celebrated Grandma's birthday running about our own family affairs and doing our own thing because someone's huge elephant of an ego refused to let anyone know. So, thanks a lot "Dad"; I'm sure Great-Grandma and the rest of the family appreciated that!